


Roots in my dreamland

by heartunderfire



Category: Madre Solo Hay Dos | Daughter From Another Mother (TV)
Genre: F/F, Friends to Lovers, Mentions of Cancer, Missing Scene, Pining, References to Illness, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-14 11:54:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29295489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heartunderfire/pseuds/heartunderfire
Summary: Ana remembers what happened on the night of the concert and comes to terms with the changes in her life.
Relationships: Ana Servín/Mariana Herrera, Mariana Herrera/Ana Servín
Comments: 6
Kudos: 65





	Roots in my dreamland

**Author's Note:**

> Hola amigxs! I wrote this fic mainly for myself because I needed a follow-up to that heartwarming confession, but I ultimately decided to share it with you all.
> 
> Disclaimer: Medical procedures are described briefly, feel free to skip if that's bothering you.
> 
> Find me on tumblr @heartunderfire, come say hi. 
> 
> P.S. The title is from "Ivy" by TS.

“Ana Servín?” 

The tension she was holding in her shoulders increased upon hearing her name being called by the nurse. With Mariana by her side, for a few minutes, she was able to focus on other things, but now it was time to confront reality. 

Ana wasn’t nervous about the procedure itself. Her doctor had already explained it in large terms and she felt prepared. However, getting this done meant she would be only weeks away from a final diagnosis. The possibility of having cancer and coming to terms with that truth were two different things. And Ana knew she would have a hard time dealing with it and its implications. 

“Go on. I’ll be with you all the way,” the brunette reassured her. She placed a hand on her shoulder, caressing it and then gently squeezed her forearm. Instinctively, Ana reciprocated the gesture, forcing a smile. For a moment, she was calm and that was more than she could hope for. 

Following the radiologist’s instructions, Ana lied on the examination table and mentally prepared herself for what was ahead. If only Mariana could be in the room with her, to hold her hand and share that sweet smile of hers. 

“Mrs Servín, are you ready? I'm going to insert the local anaesthetic. You might feel a bit of pain, but only for a few seconds.” 

Ana took a deep breath. “I’m ready.” 

It proved to be rather painful, but she clenched her fists and tried to think of something else. 

_“I'll be with you all the way”_ , Mariana’s words echoed in her mind. She pictured her in the waiting room and her pain diminished a little. It was magical the effect this woman had on her. 

Before she knew it, the doctor pulled out the needle and confirmed that her breast was completely numb. She couldn’t stand to watch anymore and turned to face the wall instead. A painting of wildflowers caught her attention and she smiled a little to herself. If Mariana were a flower, she’d definitely be a wild one. 

Ana had never been the romantic kind. Yet here she was, swimming in a sea of feelings, finding Mariana in everything that surrounded her because she was her everything. 

_“You are also very important to me.”_ Mariana’s words from the previous night touched Ana so deeply that she did what she never imagined she would do. 

_“I love you.”_ Despite being under the influence of drugs, Ana was 100% aware of what she was doing. At that moment, the rest of the world disappeared and there were only Mariana and herself, two figurines in a snow globe. And _that_ song was playing. 

**_Amar es_** ** _jugarse_** ** _la_** ** _vida_ ** ****

**_Ser un_** ** _blanco_** ** _perfecto_** ** _dejar_** ** _las_** ** _defensas_** ** _rendidas_ ** ****

At the moment, Ana felt like risking it all for an infatuation she could no longer ignore and every bit of control she had left was lost when she realised how badly she needed to kiss Mariana. In retrospective, that gesture seemed selfish and incredibly reckless. She was thankful Mariana didn’t bring it up that morning, because the shame was unbearable. Yes, Mariana was a woman who liked women, but that didn’t give Ana the right to kiss her before she consented to it. She couldn’t remember whether Mariana had reciprocated or not, but she could recall the contagious laughter that filled the room as she was embarrassing herself on stage. 

Ana had never behaved that way. Yes, she slept with Daniel, but that was only her cheap attempt at resurrecting the past, it had nothing to do with love. It did however remind her how bad things with Juan were. They had reached the point of no return and Ana hadn't been content in that marriage for a while, but she always thought that her children and her job would be enough. Mariana’s presence inspired her to want more, to be more. And with an improbable future ahead, Ana decided to follow her heart, for the first and hopefully not the last time. 

Before Ana could dive deeper into her existential crisis, the radiologist announced that the procedure was complete and she could dress up. She carefully did so, then listened to the aftercare instructions and left the room somewhat relieved. Whatever happened, she still had enough time to make things right. 

The women made eye contact as soon as Ana was back in the waiting room and Mariana greeted her with the warmest smile. It felt so good to have someone wait for her. She wanted to hug the brunette, but it wasn’t advisable in her state. She walked to her and the smell of Mariana’s perfume flooded Ana’s senses. It made her feel like she was at home, except her home was now a person. 

“How are you feeling?” 

Ana sat down and placed her handbag between them. “A bit tired, but otherwise good.” 

Mariana sighed. “I have to be somewhere, but we can go grab some cake first if you’d like.” 

Ana took her hand in hers and caressed it with her thumb. “I would have loved to, but unfortunately I have to go to work.” 

“Try not to tire yourself out now. We need you strong and healthy,” Mariana attempted to cheer her up. 

Ana felt her eyes fill with tears. “I’m trying,” she assured Mariana. There was one thing in particular that required a great deal of strength. “I should have said something this morning, but I wasn’t able to. I actually remember everything and I’m very sorry about what happened…between us. I shouldn't have kissed you,” she confessed. 

Mariana placed her other hand on top of Ana’s, reassuringly. “It’s fine. We all do crazy things when we’re a little high,” she giggled at that. “No hard feelings, promise.” 

Ana felt relieved, but also a bit disappointed. Perhaps the brunette didn’t feel the same way. “Thank you. I did mean it, though” she began, waiting for Mariana’s reaction, but when it didn’t come, she decided to continue anyway. “The _I love you_ part and everything else.” 

Ana caught a glimpse of uncertainty in Mariana’s eyes. “As a friend, right?” she asked with sadness in her voice. 

Before Ana could clarify, her phone started ringing. Right on cue. She looked at Mariana apologetically and the brunette mouthed a _Don’t worry_ and let go of her hand. Ana mentally cursed and picked up. She’d have to postpone that conversation. 

They soon parted ways, the tension still lingering in the air. Mariana deserved to know the truth and she was ready to offer it. Dying could wait, Ana had some living to do first. 

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and comments are very much appreciated! :)


End file.
